I try my best to explore, dream, discover, take risks, travel, learn new things, keep my eyes open and understand different thoughts, actions and views in life. I try my best to be an adventurer, traveler, a wanderer, a risk-taker… a stronger person than who I really am. In all honesty, I’m a shy, timid, fearful, easily-frightened, scared individual. Yup, they are all synonyms of someone who’s always afraid. And because of that, I’m the one who likes to always have a plan, be in control and be prepared for whatever comes my way. Yes, I’m a scaredy-little cat who wants to be in her battle gear all the time. But deep inside of me, there’s this voice telling me to go for it – no matter how afraid I am to dip my toes into untested waters.
Like most people who get comfortable with their regular routine or a familiar environment, I’m afraid of change. I’m afraid of a lot of things. I’m afraid of leaving the place I call home. I’m afraid to start from scratch. I’m afraid of having to say goodbye to old friends and try to make new ones. I’m afraid of what other people would think of me. I’m afraid of what could happen to me in a totally new place. In short, I’m afraid of anything new and unknown to me. But why do I always do what I’m afraid of?
I’ve been in a lot of situations in which you can technically say is against my will or opposite my personality. I do things that I wouldn’t normally do or are outside my comfort zone. I take up new challenges even if I already have a lot on my plate. I travel to places unknown to me. You’re probably wondering, then why the heck do you do it if you don’t like it? Why do it if you’re gonna be in despair or lonely? Why do it if you will be unhappy, uncomfortable, or worrisome? Why commit if you don’t have the time? Why do you want to make your life miserable?
I believe that with every race comes a finish line. I believe that with every down, there’s an up. I believe that with every sacrifice comes fulfillment. I believe that perseverance bears fruit. I believe that hard work pays off. And in the end, it all boils down to this quote from Mark Twain:
20 years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones that you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore, Dream, Discover.
And even though it could bring me misery, pain or loneliness, I try to savor every moment of it. I have to do it with open eyes, open arms and an open heart. I try to experience this new adventure to the fullest rather than just going along with it for the sake of doing it. Because only then will I learn more, understand more and succeed more. And if that risk becomes a failure, I will still take it as a great learning experience. There will be disappointments but there will also be successes. No matter what the end result be, I’d be happy to say that I tried. I conquered my fear and now getting out of it with more wisdom in tow. I may fall, but I’m getting up with more knowledge. I know what to do next time. And when I’m in my death bed recollecting my life, I’d be happy to go through all those experiences I may have turned down otherwise… and think to myself I had a fulfilled life – a fulfilled life not in terms of material things – but in terms of experiences, memories, lessons, ups and downs, failures and successes, sadness and happiness.
Wearing: 3.1 Phillip Lim for Target sweater top and pants | Hunter classic tall boots | Goyard St. Louis PM tote | Westward Leaning sunglasses | beanie from Nordstrom (similar) | Tory Burch earrings | rhinestone collar necklace | Toywatch plasteramic watch | Philippe Charriol ring and bracelet | H&M bangle | Rue bracelet.
*All photos taken at the Virginia Beach Boardwalk